I'm using another old pic of one of my tats for HNT this week.....let's all hope that by next week my creative juices will be flowing once again!
It's not based on this week's theme, but I got new glasses so I'm posting that. Thanks for the idea, Shumpy!!!
You know what annoys the shit out of me? Besides the #1 thing on my list which is lying.......is promising everything and delivering nothing. These are just two of the things that ruined my marriage, i.e. the sore spot for these particular things. But, of late, it's the promising and delivering thing that really pisses me off. I'm by nature a planner. I like to know, in a round about way, what my plans are. Don't get me wrong, spontaneity is a wonderful thing! However, when a person is constantly telling me, ".....when we do (enter whatever)......." or ".......let's do this (enter any designated time/place)....", and then does not even make an effort to deliver, I tend to start to get annoyed. I am not naive and believe everything everyone tells me. I'm old enough to know better, but would it kill someone to at least try? Perhaps my standards are too high. Perhaps I should lower them..............FUCK NO! I am worth so much more and I won't lower my standards. I shouldn't have to. People who supposedly care should want to put forth the effort.
I'm not in the habit of ranting on my blog, but I'm PMS-ing and really getting irritated at the fact that the shit-hole that my life has become is completely out of my control. Perhaps that is the reason I am bitching about this. The need for some control. My estranged husband has hid my truck and I cannot locate it. He said he put the papers in the mail........unless he mailed them from Afghanistan, they should have been here, I am sick of the games. Sick of the lies. Sick of others promising to spend time with me and not doing so. And there is always a "good" excuse. Not good enough for me, but apparently good enough for them.
OK, enough of that for the time being. Maybe someone out there will read this and give me some insight into the psyche that accounts for this behavior. Please............anyone?
I am not exactly sure how to verbalize this but there are angels. They come in all shapes, forms, creeds, and usually when you don't expect it. It is only after the fact that you realize that you have come in contact with one.
Mine is my best friend, Jen. After 25 years of friendship, she has proven to many that she is, indeed, an angel. She listens to everyone, withholding judgment and only offering her support and advice. You never have to hear the, "I told you so..." or the rest of it. She manages to not only offer her over-burdened shoulders to lean on or cry on, but to offer to assist in any way, whether it is to formulate a plan to help you out of your rut or to just lend her ear.
I don't have a great deal of true friends, those that would drop anything and everything, regardless of time or location, and help you in any way. But the few that I do have are infinitely better than a ridiculously large circle of "friends" who always seem to be unavailable when a crisis strikes.
So, thank you, Jen. You are my angel. You do what you do, not out of obligation or some other self-serving purpose, but because you love.
i don't have a mac.....and i hope that does not exclude me from the daily theme.....a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do!
this is an old HNT submission that never made it on because of my stupid camera....so i added it again......don't hold it against me! unless......never mind! :)
So, I know my little heading says to not sweat the small stuff. All fine and good in theory, however, when the small stuff piles up into a big gianormous pile of shit, I think it's fine and good to sweat it! I mean, honestly, who the hell did I piss of in such a huge way to have to deal with what I deal with on a daily basis of late? Or perhaps it is some horrible way of paying off some "debt" I incurred in another life.
Divorce is no f-ing picnic. Let me tell you. Even in the best of circumstances, it's an expensive hassle both financially and emotionally. Now the emotional toll is more of an internal dialogue that basically makes you question what you did wrong when the blame lies on the other party completely. However, in the middle of the night, when the thoughts are keeping you awake and attempting to count the rotations of the ceiling fan, that is little comfort.
And, at some point, you decide to move on with your life. Oh wait, now you can include the boatloads of baggage that you now carry and people say to themselves, "That girl cannot be normal! Run away.....!!!!". At least that is what I think.
I'm not usually in a ranting kind of mood however, this does seem to have some therapeutic value. I used to write my thoughts down in my journals.....old fashioned like with pen and paper. Of late, though, that has been little comfort and I have run out of journals to write in. So, I resort to the e-forum of ranting and raving, the blog. Not that anyone reads this, but somehow, in some small way, just seeing shit in black and white makes it a little easier to take.
Life is full of surprises. Some good, some bad. I like good surprises, not bad ones. Like when someone says they will do something and SURPRISE, they don't . Promise the world, deliver nothing.
Then there are the good surprises. The ones that just make you sit back and go, "What did I do to deserve this?". No need for elaboration. Perhaps that will come at a later date.
Sufficed to say, I'm on the mend and that's a wonderful thing.
Due to some stomach virus I seemed to have picked up somewhere, I did absolutely nothing yesterday so today is make-up day when it comes to doing what needs to be done. Need to wash the dogs. Trina keeps rolling in the dirt in the back and then she wonders why I don't want her to lie in the bed! Duh........ick.
Laundry has piled up due to my celebratory activities this past weekend. Partying has its pros and (obvious......have you seen that pic?) cons. So, today it's back to work. I know, fascinating stuff! I live the most exciting life of anyone! Don't be jealous!
So, that's the plan for the day. I need to get in my spare room and work in it but I need help getting some of the stuff out before I can even really go through the stuff in there. It's become a storage room instead of a bedroom. It needs serious help! It's definitely on the short list of things I need to get done, no time like the present!
OK, here they are. Yes, there are only two of them. But, it's kind of like a before and after kind of thing. Good god......thank you Jen for being my driver or I would have ended up passed out in the parking lot! :)
Last night was celebration number 2 for the Hellofachick birthday weekend. Went to a phenomenal Japanese restaurant in Tradition. The sushi was great, the duck incredible, and the company - my family - better than any other. So, obviously I had a good time. Thankfully it was not a late night since I was already exhausted.
Then, tonight is the final culmination with dinner at my brother's house. That's him. He took all the other pics since my Dad is the worst photographer! So, after tonight, I can look back and have incredible memories of this weekend. Considering everything else going on in my life, this was a welcome distraction. Definitely puts everything in perspective. What doesn't kill us makes us stronger, right?
Still waiting for Jen to email me the pics from Friday evening when I was WAY over-served. Obviously I am anxious to get them!
One more pic....the one at the top.......this one I personally hate but it is what it is!
They came this morning to fill in the gaping holes in my yard and now the worst part is over. The next step is having to sod the back now. Great. Add that to the ever-growing expense list!
So, as promised, here is the backyard as it is now. Hard to see the giant mound that is now the drain field but I'm posting them anyway!
It never ceases to amaze me how in a relatively short amount of time, involving cheap booze and a lack of food, you become intoxicated! Of course, I jest.
We started out at the Mojo Room, which is for a little younger crowd. That wasn't the problem. The a/c was cranked to approximately 60 degrees. And that's ok when there are hundreds of sweaty kids dancing around and drinking. However, for the elderly (us, since we are def. not the demographic of this particular club!) we chill a little easier and after a few free drinks, took the show on the road to our old standby and favorite, Harper's.
How to describe Harper's.....think of Cheers, add a blue tint from the smoke, no one in there is nearly as attractive since this is real life and not a television show, but it is the place where you can go, no matter how long it's been, and still know the bartenders, still have decent, salt-of-the-earth people to help you pick out songs on the jukebox. Jennifer and I have spent many a night in many a club, piano bar, tiki bar......you get the picture! But, we always come back to Harpers. I think you could actually show up in your pajamas......like boxers and a t-shirt.....and you would still be viewed as fashion-forward. We love that place!
So, birthday celebration #1 was a success, albeit a tad early when it came time to go home. Blame the old chick who can't drink like I used to. Again, that may be a good thing!
I don't remotely have all the pics since everywhere was as dark as a witch's lair and no amount of photography trickery was going to work. However, the ones Jen took, or rather random people in the bar took of the two of us, should be good. Just waiting for her to email them to me!
Tonight's celebration consists of this incredible Japanese restaurant out in Tradition with my Dad, his friend, my brother and his wife and I am looking forward to it. Tomorrow, the three day festival this has become involves going to my brother's and having dinner with him, Xiu Li, and Mom. Mom has promised me a carrot cake which is my favorite!
So, the pics I will post will be of some of my gifts and as as soon as I receive more, they will be posted as well! There will be pics tonight but perhaps not as entertaining as last night's!
Yes, I'm not only back, but tootin' my own horn about my birthday. Going out tonight so I plan on lots of drunken debacherous (is that a word?) photos to post ASAP! :)
Infinite thanks to Shumpy who posted my HNT pic since I was unable to do so. Also, thanks for making my birthday awesome. You are the man and I know, since that's how you roll.
So, need a nap since I never got enough sleep last night and there's nothing worse than celebrating your birthday yawning before you do shots! Esp at my age!
Hey y'all Shumpy here posting for Hellofachick. She's having internet problems today. So I'll be doing the posting for her for a bit, as needed.
Today began the construction on my new drain field. For those of you not living in the sticks like me and who don't know what it's like not to have city water and sewer, it's a huge pain the the ass. not to mention expensive. But, after years of use, things break. The joys of home ownership!
I'm going to post a few pics because the sight of a backhoe in my driveway is actually funny, especially if you had any idea how narrow and weird my driveway is!
Anyway, things are good here. I'm happy in a way I haven't been in........well I can't remember. My birthday is Friday. I have wonderful friends and family. I'm as giddy as a school girl. Lots of reasons that shall remain unmentioned since it's no one's biz but mine. However, a suppose a lot has to do with me figuring out what I want. I suppose that's all a challenge for anyone. Kind of like figuring out what you want to do when you grow up. Easy in theory, but harder once you are thrown into this big, bad world.
I need to find a home for Delilah, my min. potbellied pig. Petunia isn't going anywhere. But I can't deal with this pig in the house biz since she's the equivalent of a two-year-old walking around with a diaper and a bad attitude. I'm constantly cleaning up after her. It's a losing battle. I just want to make sure she has a good home. I tried putting her outside with Petunia but that didn't go over so well. It wasn't Petunia with the problem, it was Delilah who is 60 lbs., not 200! Go figure.
Anyway, I think I'm going to find something to eat. Lunchtime here and I'm starving. Later! :)
So, I'm sitting here on a Friday night doing nothing except programming my new cell phone. Such excitement.....how I do it I don't know! I am, however, looking forward to next Friday which is my birthday so I'm hoping to get my ass out of the house and have a good time.
Last year's b-day bit the big one. I basically didn't have one....well, I had one, but did nothing for it. That was not my choice!
Not the longest post in history. Still trying to catch up on some sleep. Someone has been keeping me up the past week yakking on the phone! I am NOT complaining one bit. It's a very good thing.
I will write more tomorrow. I am hurt no one said one thing about my HNT pic!
*sniff*
Wow, showing a little more than I bargained for but I'm not even half nekkid! So, enjoy!
Why do this? Why not?
So, I'm sitting here and emailing and texting and im'ing like the loser I feel like yesterday. Anyway, finally heard from my friend Shumpy in TX. We chatted online and then talked for three hours on the phone. I felt like I was 15. And my point to all this is that I have missed my friends so much. And having to explain why I basically disappeared and whatever is not an easy thing. Good thing that people are extremely understanding and have been so supportive and wonderful.
I'm sure I sounded like the wicked witch bitching about things but he just listened patiently.
See, we have "known" one another for a while now but have never met in person. Mostly due to the distance between TX and FL. However, he happened to be at the Jimmy Buffett concert in 2006 and we didn't even know. Oh, to go back in time.
Thanks, Shump for taking the time. You're the best!
So, another day and certainly not another dollar. This situation is ridiculous. But at least I get plenty of time to contemplate things and get back to myself which is the basic reason I am not in my marriage anymore. When you lose yourself, you have nothing to offer the other person and if someone knows how to not do that, I would love the input!
I am starting to figure out what I need in order to get back to me. Definitely not something that happens overnight. But I will get there. I always land on my feet.
So, yes, it's been a long time since I have taken the time to write anything on my blog, and there really is no excuse other than laziness.
Let's see, the last thing was most likely how happily married I was and that I was some warped Cinderella but apparently I forgot all about those damn shoes and I'm now separated from my husband. What happens next, they don't hand out a manual for that kind of thing so I can't begin to say.
I have my two dogs, he took the other dog. I have my house and that's about all. However, I suppose I do have a shred of self-respect although it's lonely but that will pass. Kind of the pull yourself up by the bootstraps thing. You know?
That's the update. I will write more later since I don't sleep too much of late. It's strange sleeping in an empty bed with the exception of my dogs and they tend to hog the covers......hey, it's no different than sleeping with a man! :)
And don't worry, I am not going to turn into some man hater. That's just not me.
