Promises, promises......

You know what annoys the shit out of me? Besides the #1 thing on my list which is lying.......is promising everything and delivering nothing. These are just two of the things that ruined my marriage, i.e. the sore spot for these particular things. But, of late, it's the promising and delivering thing that really pisses me off. I'm by nature a planner. I like to know, in a round about way, what my plans are. Don't get me wrong, spontaneity is a wonderful thing! However, when a person is constantly telling me, ".....when we do (enter whatever)......." or ".......let's do this (enter any designated time/place)....", and then does not even make an effort to deliver, I tend to start to get annoyed. I am not naive and believe everything everyone tells me. I'm old enough to know better, but would it kill someone to at least try? Perhaps my standards are too high. Perhaps I should lower them..............FUCK NO! I am worth so much more and I won't lower my standards. I shouldn't have to. People who supposedly care should want to put forth the effort.
I'm not in the habit of ranting on my blog, but I'm PMS-ing and really getting irritated at the fact that the shit-hole that my life has become is completely out of my control. Perhaps that is the reason I am bitching about this. The need for some control. My estranged husband has hid my truck and I cannot locate it. He said he put the papers in the mail........unless he mailed them from Afghanistan, they should have been here, I am sick of the games. Sick of the lies. Sick of others promising to spend time with me and not doing so. And there is always a "good" excuse. Not good enough for me, but apparently good enough for them.
OK, enough of that for the time being. Maybe someone out there will read this and give me some insight into the psyche that accounts for this behavior. Please............anyone?

HNT again!

Happy Easter HNT!

i feel like an over-sized Easter egg! :) Happy HNT and Happy Easter everyone!

Angels

I am not exactly sure how to verbalize this but there are angels. They come in all shapes, forms, creeds, and usually when you don't expect it. It is only after the fact that you realize that you have come in contact with one.
Mine is my best friend, Jen. After 25 years of friendship, she has proven to many that she is, indeed, an angel. She listens to everyone, withholding judgment and only offering her support and advice. You never have to hear the, "I told you so..." or the rest of it. She manages to not only offer her over-burdened shoulders to lean on or cry on, but to offer to assist in any way, whether it is to formulate a plan to help you out of your rut or to just lend her ear.
I don't have a great deal of true friends, those that would drop anything and everything, regardless of time or location, and help you in any way. But the few that I do have are infinitely better than a ridiculously large circle of "friends" who always seem to be unavailable when a crisis strikes.
So, thank you, Jen. You are my angel. You do what you do, not out of obligation or some other self-serving purpose, but because you love.

Happy Early St. Patrick's Day

HNT!!!!

i don't have a mac.....and i hope that does not exclude me from the daily theme.....a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do!
this is an old HNT submission that never made it on because of my stupid camera....so i added it again......don't hold it against me! unless......never mind! :)

Just makes me laugh........Muppets rule!

The Muppet Matrix - Watch more free videos

I will survive!!!!

WTF?

So, I know my little heading says to not sweat the small stuff. All fine and good in theory, however, when the small stuff piles up into a big gianormous pile of shit, I think it's fine and good to sweat it! I mean, honestly, who the hell did I piss of in such a huge way to have to deal with what I deal with on a daily basis of late? Or perhaps it is some horrible way of paying off some "debt" I incurred in another life.
Divorce is no f-ing picnic. Let me tell you. Even in the best of circumstances, it's an expensive hassle both financially and emotionally. Now the emotional toll is more of an internal dialogue that basically makes you question what you did wrong when the blame lies on the other party completely. However, in the middle of the night, when the thoughts are keeping you awake and attempting to count the rotations of the ceiling fan, that is little comfort.
And, at some point, you decide to move on with your life. Oh wait, now you can include the boatloads of baggage that you now carry and people say to themselves, "That girl cannot be normal! Run away.....!!!!". At least that is what I think.
I'm not usually in a ranting kind of mood however, this does seem to have some therapeutic value. I used to write my thoughts down in my journals.....old fashioned like with pen and paper. Of late, though, that has been little comfort and I have run out of journals to write in. So, I resort to the e-forum of ranting and raving, the blog. Not that anyone reads this, but somehow, in some small way, just seeing shit in black and white makes it a little easier to take.

Surprises

Life is full of surprises. Some good, some bad. I like good surprises, not bad ones. Like when someone says they will do something and SURPRISE, they don't . Promise the world, deliver nothing.
Then there are the good surprises. The ones that just make you sit back and go, "What did I do to deserve this?". No need for elaboration. Perhaps that will come at a later date.
Sufficed to say, I'm on the mend and that's a wonderful thing.